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Mandy rolled out of bed and walked across the hall into the bathroom. Locking the door, she looked at herself in the mirror hanging on the back of it. Her short brown hair was messy and needed brushing again. Her sleep pants were hitched up her legs, looking like cartoon shorts. Her 32C chest was barely noticable in the baggy t-shirt she was wearing. She sighed and went to work on her hair with a brush. Ten minutes later, she stepped out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel. She slipped into her room and locked the door. She didn't want her mother to see her in a towel. She would flip.Her parents came from highly devout Catholic families. To them, wearing pants shorter than the knee and shirts with sleeves shorter than the elbow meant you were a whore and were going to hell.Growing up with a family like that, it was no wonder she got in trouble a lot. She was a free spirit who liked being unrestricted by clothes. If she could, she'd walk around naked. But once, her mother caught her. No longer would I have to endure his little squeaks of triumph as he barrelled across the floor, up onto the table and made off with a leg of lamb or a couple of kilos of cheese. He was now mouse pancake. My retarded Sulphur Crested Cockatoo, Hanns Schmidt had looked on as the mouse had zigged when he should have zagged. The bird rocked merrily on his perch and let loose with his customary litany of death threats before lapsing into demented mutterings about nothing. I would have got rid of Hanns a long time ago but I had heard that Cockatoos tasted like shit. Maybe with a bit of cranberry jelly on New Years day.Actually in the interests of accuracy it was really the early hours of Christmas day. As usual I had found it impossible to sleep and was feeling pretty sorry for myself. It was my first Christmas on my own and also the first in my new flat. There I was... lying on the couch with the murder of the mouse a nearly forgotten memory. To create a bit of atmosphere I had piled logs.
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