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But have a thirty inch waist.“What’s your problem?” he barked at me.I simply stated in a very calm matter of fact voice that I agreed with Beth, maybe it was time to go. I offered to follow them home and make sure everyone got home safe and sound. This family did not need any further tragedy.“Well, since I don’t give a fuck about her opinion.” he said, pointing at Beth, “What makes you think I give a fuck about yours.”“Personally what you give a fuck about is the least of my worries.” I calmly replied, “If you want to kill yourself, great, but I don’t want anything to happen to Beth.”“Take a fucking hike asshole.” he replied and put his finger in my face.Beth reached over and grabbed my shoulder. She pleaded with us not to do this. She just wanted to go home. But if it was going to cause all these problems, she agreed to stay with Lance. He sneered at me, turned around and sat back at the bar. I knew as long as Lance was getting free drinks, he would not leave. Besides, he was too. ”He sobs as tears run down from his eyes. I lean forward and pluck one from his cheek with the tip of my tongue, tasting salt as I lean over to look him in the eyes, grinning as I lick my lips.“Please, Miss Santos, just take me home, I won’t tell no-one”I tilt my head, turning first one way and then the other, as if considering his suggestion.“No” I whisper.I climb off the bed, rummaging underneath it and removing two items. The first is the large pair of rubber testicles I used with Mr Chesterton. I figure Jimmy might need something to bite on in a little while. The second is a ludicrously oversized dildo. It was a secret santa gift in my last year in college. It’s bright purple silicon with glitter all through it. One end is sensibly proportioned for a vagina-having partner to grip comfortably (and yes, you really need good kegels for this to work). The other is absurd, about 12 inches long, with a bulbous head perhaps 2 inches in diameter, narrowing on the curved shaft to an inch.
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