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You came to me - keeping me away from the place you had been, and well in the middle of the "safety" of the path. You asked if you might walk with me for a bit - explaining that the woods were not entirely safe, and when I told you that I had grown up in them and knew them like an old friend, you told me that even old friends have secrets - and that some of them held danger.Although I was irked by your suggestion that I could not take care of myself, I enjoyed your voice - low and like the the shifting shadows of the leaves in the breeze and occasionally as bright as the sun that filtered through them - and wanted to hear more. Still, as you talked - and we moved along the shadowy path, deeper into the woods than I had intended to go - I traced the outline of my dagger against my thigh and found a comforting sense of safety in its lines and the coolness of the steel against my skin. As my fingertips followed the pattern of pommel to blade and back - in subconscious infinity loops. “Do you think you fear dogs because of this sexual attraction?” he asked.“Haven’t we been over this?” she asked. “Yes. You said my physical attraction clashes with my mental self which makes me scared, or something like that.”“I would like you to show a full understanding of your condition. Try telling me in your own words.” he said calmly.Amy thought for a moment.“Alright. My physical attraction to dogs makes me uncomfortable. That’s the clash, I shouldn’t be sexually attracted to things that I find so mentally repulsive. Because of the attack, my brain has tangled up the ideas of dogs and sex so tightly that I can’t undo one without addressing the other simultaneously. Right?”“Right.” he confirmed.“If I tried to get accustomed to dogs in a non-sexual sense this wouldn’t resolve any of the sexual misplacement, and since they are so tightly wound that would basically have no effect. I can’t force a sexual attraction to humans because the knot in my psyche has clouded my brain so much.
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