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Ivana and I are sitting on the couch in my dorm, watching TV and the movie Waiting to Exhale comes on. If there is a worse portrayal of black men in motion picture history, I haven’t seen it. The gals in that movie do nothing but bash black men in general and blame all of the world’s problems on them. Every woman I know, ( with the exception of my mother and grandmother) seem to agree that this movie is right-on. Ivana watches the movie and she tells me she thinks the gals in it are a bunch of lazy, oversexed slobs. She thinks they should fix themselves and take some responsibility for what’s going on in their lives rather than blame all of their problems on black men. My thoughts exactly! Ivana and I agreed on this, and so many other things. We were both considered unusual, at least by our families and communities. I love ice hockey. And I actually played in high school. I don’t much care for NCAA or professional football, basketball or baseball. To me, ice hockey is far more. She felt like she wasnt able to provide for me so she told my stepdad to keep me and when i turned 18 i could get the fuck out. Carl (my stepdad) was more than happy to keep me but he told me that i would have to do my share around the house. Cooking and cleaning became the norm. Often when id be on my hands and knees scrubbing hed be sitting down getting a full view. One day he told me, no, he DEMMANDED that i clean with no clothes on. I reluctantly did as i was told. When that wasnt enough, he suggested that as of now, when i got home from school, i was not allowed to have any clothes on. I remember the first time he came into my room. Being a light sleeper, i felt his presence as soon as he came in. He didnt do much that night. Some light fingering and a bit of touching. I remember staying up all night hoping he would return. He didnt come back until 6 days later. Then it became a daily routine. Then i guess he got bored or figured that my participation would be required.
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