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" No, you can't make me forget, Helen. Ever." But sure you can forgive me? After all, he blackmailed me." Sure I can forgive you. But I'm sure that I would never really trust you. And it would never work in the long run." We could make it work. I would make it worth that for you." Helen, how can I trust you, if you can't even tell the truth about what happened to our sons or to my parents?" So, I take it that you told your version to MY daughter?"I could hear that she was now pissed off, and I didn't miss that she referred Mina as HER daughter."No, Helen, she figured it out by herself. In fact, she probably suspected it before I knew anything. Yet, you didn't tell the truth to anyone. You just allowed them to blame me." But I admitted that I made a mistake! Can't you just forgive me?" Helen, like I said, I surely can forgive you. But it does not mean that we should, or could, get back together." You're being unreasonable, John. What do you want from me? What do you want me to do?". Can't do a lot about that, but if someone gets wasted and starts bad-mouthing people, getting into hassles with other people, we kick them out. We just want to get along, you know?"I nodded like I understood. I contemplated asking questions, but I couldn't think of a way not to make them sound judgmental.He laughed at my expression. "You're asking yourself, why we choose to live like this." I guess," I said, trying to be noncommittal and nonjudgmental."Marcus, he's a good man; he used to live in a place like this, so he understands. Sometimes life is a bitch, you wake up one day with everything gone. You piss away your life; that or suck it up your nose, or shoot it in your arm, or drink it out of a bottle. We had one guy once who had been an executive in a computer company; he lost a fortune, and came here to try to forget, to drown in a bottle."Only way to really forget is to die; otherwise, you wake up mornings, sober or getting there, and the world is still there, what you did,.
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