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"You, You, You!" I screamed incoherently. "You do realize that youconfirmed the 'Joan' thing with Billy and Jim and then referred to me as'her'?" "So?" she asked. "Sam, what was the ONE thing I told you about calling me Joan?" "That I don't do it in public," she said. "So?" she asked again. Couldshe really be that stupid, I wondered? "Sam you completely emasculated me in front of those two idiots formerlyknown as my friends. Billy called me 'Joan' and you confirmed it. But,that wasn't enough! You had to add the 'her' icing on the cake, didn'tyou?" "Don't you want to know how it turned out?" she asked me. "No, Sam. I don't. You obviously don't get it. I don't ever want to hearabout this afternoon again." She looked at me, shook her head and said, "No, thank you Joan forreminding me why I don't have any girlfriends." I stared at her indisbelief wondering if she grasped the irony of her own statement. "OK Sam, that's enough for one evening. I hope you'll take good care ofteddy as I've. I was indeed bruised all over as well as scraped. The soap stung. Ursus encourage me to scrub well and get out all of the grit. The water had a red tinge as it swirled down the drain.Using a rag that happened to be an old towel, I dried off and dug the first-aid supplies out from under the sink. Given that the family had five kids, we had lots of patching material. I put antibiotic salve over everything that bled, and then bandaged myself up, using gauze for the bigger wounds.I hadn't brought any clean clothes in with me. "Would someone go get my pajamas, please," I called. Mom shoved my pajamas through the crack. I pulled the bottoms on."Let me take a look at you before you finish getting dressed." I opened up the door, and she inspected me. "Pull up the legs." She shook her head. "I heard you beat the hell out of the boys who did this." Yes." Good. The little bastards deserved it. Your supper is staying warm in the oven." She took a look at the floor. "Damn it! Those were school.
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