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Breasts are ludicrous,But lovely,Much like a pair of pantiesRolled down to the knees,No longer clothing,But ornament--When they do not give suckTo infants' needs,Breasts are panties, too,Rolled down to the knees.God or nature,Take your pick,Must have thoughtA million years or soBefore decidingWhere to placeThe buttocksSo as to transformTorso into thighs,Thighs into backAnd belly;We can only wonder howMany millennia HeOr it spent in fixingThe location of women'sBouncing breasts.There is something about a pairOf buttocks, sleek and full and round,That begs for punishment.In a cruel world such as ours,Beauty is as much or moreA liability as it is an asset.Woe be she who is callipygian,For she shall be hunted downAnd impaled upon masculinityBoth merciless and relentless:We live in wicked times!It is impossible for mostTo look upon a seated nudeAnd imagine her at stool;The beauty of her buttocksBelies the thought that she,Like you and me, must answerNature's call to defecate.We would. .. Hey Claire.”She quickly put her arm on mine, as I said, “Susan has asked us to join her and my best friend, Brian Fleming, at the dance at your school in three weeks. If we learn enough from Jimmy, we could all ‘cut a rug’ at the dance, couldn’t we?”“That sounds like a ton of fun as long as the parental units don’t freak out,” Claire said giggling again. “I would love to go with all of you to our school dance. Its theme is ... What is it? Oh yes, Summer Memories. Let’s all exchange phone numbers before we leave, OK?”At that moment, Jimmy was announcing to the returning students that there was a talented new couple that had just started tonight.“Here they are, direct from having their first dance lesson together, Claire McArthur and Charles Newman!”There was a light applause and Jimmy started the Elvis Presley song “Are You Lonesome Tonight,” again.We walked through the parting crowd and in perfect sync we turned toward each other and went to Closed Position and started dancing. I.
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