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They stayed together for several years, but she never quite 'moved in' with him although her clothes were about evenly scattered between the two houses fairly quickly. She also sometimes 'forgot' what house she was in, and I got a good many looks at a very pretty naked Marsha walking down the hall or into the kitchen before she'd laugh and go put on a robe. I swear, sometimes I think she even did it on purpose!Don't say it — I was an idiot in those days!This year also saw the genesis of my first and possibly favorite game 'series', and I owed it all to Olivia and Ashley. They were playing together one Friday night right after dinner and Marsha had gone out for the evening with Jeff. I was sitting in the living room rather low on ambition and reading a graphics manual while listening to the girls play. To my surprise their conversation seemed more and more interesting than my book and soon I was listening to them with fascination.It seemed one of their dolls, "the Princess", needed to. No, the tension arose from the not knowing. The not knowing in view of the wanting and that nagging voice coming up from the hind brain that repeatedly urged, "Go ahead. Have a bite. It's just an apple."I smiled to myself and thought, "Lead me not into temptation. I know the way myself."Despite that sometimes-delicious pull into the last taboo, we continued to be comfortable about each other. As long periods of silence are comfortable among close friends, we had no feeling of malaise around our unresolved passions. We were, both of us I think, content in following the thread of our lives and our connection, not knowing where it would take us.There was a time, both before and again later, when I practiced a studied imperturbability, a coolness on the surface that frequently gave the lie to the cauldron beneath. I certainly didn't suffer from alexithymia... that failure to recognize feelings when I had them. To the contrary, I was in heightened contact with my feelings. As a safe.
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