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.. or failed to remember the list. The Kona came from the freezer ... something I had bought a bunch of because I liked the smell. Smell and taste are not necessarily inclusive.When I dabbled with tobacco ... I took up the pipe. I took up the pipe because she said I should; a pipe was dignified. She? Damned if I remember.If the tobacco smelled awful ... it tasted pretty good. If the smell was pleasant? Eww!Back to coffee. If anyone figures out how to make coffee taste as good as it smells? I understand the Germans are working on it.But breakfast? I suppose it was my fault. It started in Michigan. Mom was sick and I was being helpful ... she ate it. I don’t know how ... I wouldn’t. She did. When she recovered ... which I think the breakfast had a lot to do with ... she called all us kids in the kitchen and said, “You need to learn to cook. I might not be here and you need to now how to feed yourselves,” here she looked me squarely in the eye, “and not poison your eaters.”Jumping ahead. Looking equal parts nervous and excited. A young woman about to have an adventure, a little girl scared of what might happen.“Hello, my name’s Hope Carrington, I’m 18 years old, and I want to be fucked – hard – by a big dog, so I do!”Inside room 217, sitting on the bed, we find short, fat gay Eddie, and his sleek, energetic Irish Setter, Paddy. Paddy is leaning against Eddie with tongue is hanging out, whilst Eddie is gently fondling the dog’s sheath – there’s already a little purple/pink lipstick showing.“I’m Eddie ... And this is Paddy. He’s 3 years old, and he’s bisexual, I’m 53, and I’m not!” He has that drab midlands accent, with the hint of gay fun.They’re waiting.He continues, “I’ve never been attracted to women in my life, but I love Paddy, and he certainly appeared to love having sex with a woman last time we were on the show ... So I’m looking forward, very much, to seeing him in action with another one of them. This will only be his second time.”Then the door of the room.
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