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My sex life is like a Ferrari. I don’t have a Ferrari.NASA’s robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Curiosity’s early pictures showed no signs of ESPN, beer, or porn. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars.My mother-in-law is coming I had to clear out half my closet so she could have a place to hang upside down and sleep.Men have feelings too, for example, we feel hungry.I once won an argument with a woman ... In this dream I had.If there was a way to read a woman’s mind, I’m not sure I want it. I hate shoes, shopping, gossip, and I already know I’m an annoying.It’s funny that when my girlfriend gives me the “silent treatment” she thinks it’s punishment.Judging by the frying pan is whizzing by my head, I did something. I can’t wait to find out what was.The Morning AfterDave woke up after the annual office Christmas party with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.After a trip to the bathroom, he made his way. I did not sit back down on the couch and act as if nothing had just happened. Instead, I went up stairs and started to pack. I had a suit case and a garment bag pretty well loaded by the time Cathy realized I wasn’t watching TV and came up stairs to see what I was doing. I had the garment bag laying across the bed and was just closing the suitcase when she walked into the bedroom. I saw both shock and terror on her face as she saw me. “What are you doing?” There was pure panic in her voice as she spoke. “I’m going to make it easy for you to have sex with as many guys as you want,” I said. I could see the tears in her eyes already. “Oh honey, don’t be crazy, I never cheated on you or anything, never, never once. I love you. I promise to never say anything again about having sex with anyone else. I love you, honey. Please, please don’t do this.” “Honey, in seven years of marriage, I can truthfully say, I have never, even thought of have sex with another woman. You know why? Because.
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