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I'd been thinking of it as a way to get out of the house. Only, I hadn't been home all day, and it wasn't like I didn't have company. I didn't need to meet Eddie the way I thought I did anymore. But, somewhere along the line, I began to realize that while I didn't need to meet him, I sort of wanted to. In fact, I'd been looking forward to it. That surprised even me. It also surprised Eddie, I think. He was in a particularly good mood when he picked me up at Brian's. He only stuck around a minute to say 'Hi' to Luke before we were leaving."You know, if you want to make it a short lesson I could drop you off back over there when we're finished," Eddie offered."Do you have other plans or something?" I asked."No," he said quickly. "I just thought you might want to spend some time with your friends, that's all." Well, we made plans, right? I can do that another time." Yeah," Eddie agreed, and smiled. "We made plans."We'd learned a thing or two since the last time Eddie had attempted a. After he died, things got bad pretty fast."What I'm trying to say is ... Can You Ever Forgive Me? I know you want to go away to this college, and that's fine. We'll find the money, somehow. I owe you that much. I'll call your school and tell them to let you take their tests and graduate, now. It's what you want. I understand but please, let's stay in touch. Don't go away and never look back, Please?"She was sincere and tearful. Her heart was in this apology, and I didn't have the desire or the heart to rub it in, so I held her and said, "It's Ok. I'm not mad. I don't resent you. I hate him, and that's not going to change. Do not call me someday and say you two worked it out, and I should come home because all is forgiven. It's not. He's never going to hear from me again until I can spit on his grave."You're my mother and I love you. That's never going to change, but I am going away. There's a wonderful opportunity to make something out of myself, and these people are willing to give.
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