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I’ll let you know when they are all on side.’ The teachers were all onside by the end of the day. What was a singular act of rebellion soon generated into a massive upsurge of resistance to Henry’s despotism. The reason that this remained hidden from the general school population was our desire to succeed. My biggest concern was with Melinda Barrett. It became obvious to me that she had a crush on me. She was always the first to offer help with anything to do with the play. She was always the first to answer any question I had of the class, and she was almost always right. It came to a head on the bus trip to Sydney. She managed to grab the seat next to me on the bus and, as we talked she would touch me. Don’t get me wrong, there was nothing intimate about the contact, nevertheless it made me feel both uncomfortable and flattered. I realised that I had feelings for her, feelings that I could not allow to develop, feelings that I must fight, feelings that a part of me didn’t want to. ‘That should be obvious: the emotional ties we share, your intelligence, your maturity…’ She gave me a sour look. ‘Your maturity,’ I said again, ‘which should not be underrated. Have you talked to a 25 year-old hunky guy lately?’ ‘Well,’ she said. ‘Exactly,’ I said. ‘Same for me. It’s all packaging. Lovely wrapping paper, but when you open the box, there’s nothing inside.’ ‘Oh,’ she said, smiling, ‘there sometimes could be a pretty stiff cock inside.’ She glanced sidelong up at me. ‘Those can be quite fun to play with.’ ‘I said box.’ ‘Of course. Though you know I rather like boxes, too.’ I stopped walking and looked at her. ‘Sorry,’ she said. We resumed walking. ‘What I’m trying to say is that you are impossibly more attractive than a younger woman can be. I love the gray in your hair, those fine smile lines around the eyes—they are evidence of your life experience, of your character.’ ‘You think I have lines around my eyes?’ ‘Look,’ I said, stopping and turning her towards me, ‘you.
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