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Many years ago my two siblings were captured and killed by a most-wicked witch. A very Grimm story. This year I would wish for the ability to destroy her. I realize I'm too old to be writing letters to Santa. But, I'm also too old to eat corn dogs and tater tots alone which I do every night. Always hopeful, despite a lifetime of disappointment, I jumped from bed Christmas morning and dashed to my appropriately artificial Christmas tree. Luckily I avoided a substantial pile of mouse droppings which proved those little bastards had been stirring all night.Dangling from a scrawny Charley Brown-esque branch was an amulet with a Post-it note attached. The medallion was the silhouette of a witch riding a broom with a thick red line through it. The note provided the details: "Suzi per your wish this amulet will provide what you seek. You have but twenty-four hours to accomplish your quest or it will turn into a pumpkin. PS, would it kill you to wish for a cookbook? Your cookies suck!!! and. ” Then, she arose from her chair and left me. I left for work as usual.It was perhaps 9:30am when the police officers walked into my office trailer complex and sought to question me. Where was I between the hours of six and midnight” Who were my witnesses? Did I know Jack Pranz? And on and on . As the lunch time approached, I suggested that we adjourn to the nearby restaurant for lunch and the officers complied. Of course, I was at home with my wife and kids during the hours in question and they were all a witness. No, I never met Jack Pranz. When he asked if I was aware that he had been friendly with your wife I replied truthfully that I was and felt no remorse about the fate of Mr Pranz.A police audit had just completed an audit of my firm’s accounts - no large withdrawal that couldn’t be accounted for. Then, with my permission, they went over my personal accounts. The police had a busy day. That night, on my return home, I found Mel cold and unapproachable. She managed to.
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