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Only I’m scared you might leave again. I don’t think I could take it, Tommy. I am alone now, and I don’t think I could take your leaving again. Please, promise me you won’t go. Please…” she said."This was important… more important than I first thought. I thought about what she had said. I never knew she’d had such a hard life. I certainly didn’t mean to make it any harder on her. I didn’t leave because I wanted to get out of San Antonio - I had it pretty good while I was here. I left because I got a chance to go to college and better myself. But in so doing, I lost a lot too. My father was killed and I didn’t get to say goodbye. And I had hurt a very important person in my life.Well, one of those things I could fix.I sat up in bed and pulled her to me. I took her hands in my own, “Rosa, look at me,” I said. She looked up, her eyes filled with tears. “Rosa, I promise you, I am not leaving again. I have no reason to leave. My college is here online and my job is here. My mother is here. He was obviously disappointed in me, as was I in myself, but there was still our love. That in itself gave me the strength to be patient. I would wait however long it took, and I would so faithfully. I went about the rest of that day and the next running errands, cleaning house, preparing for my family to return home. I stayed in a positive frame of mind. And I prayed a lot. I was still getting high throughout my day, keeping it outside. I considered taking one of the X pills tucked away in purse but decided against it. The pot was bad enough, I had to stay strong and not turn to hard drugs again. Regardless of the outcome of his decision I had to get my life back on track. I was being level headed enough to realize there was more than a marriage at stake, I had children to care for. They deserved a mom that had her shit together, so that was my goal. Late the next night after our lunch date he texted me. – I miss you Those three simple words caused butterflies in my belly. – I.
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