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I don’t sleep much that night. I’d like to say the drama at work is part of what keeps me up, but the truth is it’s all about Jasmine. Jasmine, AJ, and the new visual of them living in happy, domestic, upper-class bliss. Probably the hardest thing to deal with when you lose the love of your life is to have to discover that you simply weren’t that to them. I know exactly what Jasmine meant to me. I have no idea what I meant to her at all. Sometimes I wonder if I meant anything. I think about the gymrat, and the faceless cuckold husband, and I feel sick. It seems only fair. – The next day’s session with Teddy Fields goes by without incident. The truth is I’m just not as focused as I was before. The technical aspects, the overdubbing and mixing, all feel so mechanical to me. The music itself, melancholy and murky, is now weighing down the same soul it helped lift up the day before. Teddy notices and, after the session is over, he leans on the door frame and asks, ‘You gonna live?’ I. "Say half seven ok? I'll get some snacks on my way home" That's good for me" she purred."Cool" I replied. "What should I wear? Casual? Smart? Only I don't know her" Oh just dress how you know I like you to dress. Bye for now" I smiled and said "Bye" and she was gone, leaving me to wonder what this Becky was like and would she think I was a bit young and tarty.After an easy drive home from work I locked my car up and walked in the warmth of the evening sun up the path to the lobby that led to my flat. I went straight up the stairs and, looking at the time as I entered, saw that I had just over a hour to get ready and get a few snacks together. I did the latter first and popped them into the fridge before taking a shower,"Hmm. This could be bloody good" I said to myself as the hot water cascaded down and my right hand slipped between my thighs and parted my labia.Time though was short and as I had to dry my hair, get dressed and do my make up I decided against masturbating in the.
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