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But of course she couldn’t. She wasn’t raised that way, so she would endure. Near the end Dante drank heavily to help him get to sleep. He was quite brutal in his sexual demands, yet on she suffered, convinced that to not have his attention was to be unloved. In her heart of hearts she believed all of the bad things happening were her fault, because everything was her fault, just as she had been told all of her life. The night he snapped she received a phone call from the husband of one of her friends about a play date for Matt. It was an innocuous call of course, but had great import for Dante, who was convinced it was her lover. He was relentless in his accusations and she was sobbing hysterically when he finally left her alone to do as she pleased. Catherine retreated to the bedroom to hide and to drink herself to sleep. The kids were very quiet in their rooms that night. They were even more invisible than usual when Dante was in one of his ‘moods.’ They had the physical scars a. “Do you remember what you did on the way home?” her mother asked.Jennifer’s eyes glazed over as she thought back. She frowned. “I got horny and Bobby helped me, and it was wonderful, except that suddenly I thought my face was going to fall off.”“Yes, well, I watched what he did, and I got horny too. And I needed what you needed, and he was right there and I lost control again. I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean to do it. I had even told him we couldn’t do it any more until we got some con-” She stopped suddenly as she realized she had just confessed to planning to keep having sex with Bobby. “doms,” she finished, softly. She looked at Jennifer. “I’m sorry. It’s really hard for me to resist him. I think I’m in...” She stopped. She’d been about to confess to her daughter that she was afraid she was falling in love. Instead, she finished with: “fatuated with him. I mean a lot, honey. He makes me think of things I thought I couldn’t have any more.”“Oh, I know where you’re coming from there,”.
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