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Couldn't I have stopped there?What had made me cross the line from crossdresser to post-optransexual? I looked down at my arm and pinched a layer of fat on myelbow and thought about the wrinkles and pudge that been added to mybody to make me appear decades older than I really was. It was the agething that had sealed the deal for me.I looked across the table at Ben as he moved his board piece to ParkPlace. If all I had wanted was to be a girl, I could have been the kindof young girl that throws off shockwaves to a boy, Ben's age. But I hadnever wanted to be a cheerleader. Had I? Oh no. Not me. I asked Mr.Edwards if he could pour me another glass of wine? As I watched himfill my glass, I thought, well...he never would have done that if Ilooked like a 17 year old boy, would he? Of course he wouldn't! Mr.Edwards was neither a pedophile or a homosexual. But how would he feelif he learned the truth about me?The first thing that came to mind was my age. Since I was over the ageof 16, there. I noticed that Vanesssa was frowning a bit, and perhaps hesitating before talking. "Got something more than a shoe to share, love?"Polyamory?"I'm going to mention something that might need to stay a fantasy. It also might be something great." Obviously, you have my complete attention." We've established that neither of us has problems with sex with others beside us. There's also, I think, a shared assumption that we do have an obligation to keep each other as the primary emotional relationship. I've been thinking, though, about things that might fall between the two, into polyamory."You know that there are times that I seem to need girl talk. I'm not suggesting that I'm really a lesbian."So I don't risk our relationship, I'm wondering if I may want some emotionally intimate girlfriends living with us. It's too dangerous if I go out on my own for that."There are at least a couple of women to whom I can relate like that, but that we both trust. Jill is the most obvious. You knew Molly.
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