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For the both of us.Lilly, I realized from our conversations on the drive up, had the standard starry-eyed Midwestern expectations most people have of the place. There was probably a time when I did as well. But those days, for me anyway, were long gone. Lilly saw the glamour, the bright colors, the fascinating façade, and was as thrilled as any young wannabe starlet fresh off the bus from Oshkosh.I saw the rust hiding behind the chrome. I felt the horrendous anxiety, the immense insecurity, the barely muted anger and dissatisfaction that bubbled beneath the smiling faces we saw wherever we went. The relentless ambition, ruthless greed, remorseless lust ... they were everywhere. They almost completely blotted out the thin layer of more positive emotions I could sense lying beneath like a thick ugly cloud of smog squatting over a field of daisies.LA is huge, sprawling and ominous. There were times when it seemed to go on forever, hungrily expanding like a cancer, always looking for. “Are we really going to get married this summer?”“We really are if you really want to.”“Oh, yes, I really want to. Really!”She did well in her exams and was on course for a first class degree the following year. This time neither of her parents was anywhere to be found as the term ended, but once she was back home, Penny, Martin, the ‘girls’ and my family were eager to congratulate her and to celebrate her success.We announced our intention and of course all the females became a thoroughly efficient and energetic team for wedding preparations. We males were abandoned, which seemed to mean we were to keep out of the way unless needed in some ancillary rôle.By the end of July, both Connie and Penny were on summer holidays and my mother completed a formidable trio always free to prepare. I was relieved to be sidelined as I settled into my new rôle at work. There were regular partners’ meetings and a deal more administrative work which the other two were delighted to pass onto me! I also.
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