In fact, she made both cups exactly the same even though I knew she never put sugar in hers and much more creamer. She then offered me my cup, again ceremoniously, and watched as I took my first sip. The look in her eyes was hopeful and apprehensive at the same time. It was not until I looked at her and smiled, leaned back and put my feet back up, and sighed happily that she picked up her own. Before she actually took a drink she looked at me and asked permission to drink with me. I had assumed, reasonably I thought, that having her make her own tea as well as mine was indication and approval enough. I've since learned not to make such assumptions.I invited her to drink her tea and started up a conversation with her. I wanted to know what brought this on. Not just tonight, but just why in general. I may have understood at some level, but I needed to hear it from her. It took a few false starts but once she started it all came flooding out. This woman was able to amaze me at every. Those who define their life’s path by the compass point of fear, who use fear as the driving force behind their life, never understand what it means to truly live. And what is it that we fear, what incalculable force could make hiding away from life a better option than taking the rudder of own lives in our hands? Pain of course. None of us (well… mostly none of us) like pain. It is another common denominator of the universe, that pain is something to be avoided at all costs. Why? Our physical response to pain, mired in the primordial ooze of our creation, is what stokes the fires of our fears. Our desire for one more breath, one more sunrise, one more beat of our heart, provides us with a natural aversion to pain Our ancestors needed the fear of pain to continue living. Our ‘fight or flight’ response is there for one reason, to keep us breathing. When, over the next ridge, you may find a pride of saber tooth tigers that you will have to battle with your bare hands, or a bear.
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